the veginator

22 Sep

I’m sure most of you have been subjected to the disgusting commercials that Carl’s Jr./Hardees puts out. When they aren’t exploiting/abusing cows or using explicit sexual images to sell their food, they end them by slopping down the burger at the end of the commercial. A huge, cardiac arrest-inducing burger drops from the sky, with 3 different kinds of animals in 8 different forms oozing out of it and the announcer blathers on about what an amazing burger it is. Their bent is on being manly, even when they don’t explicitly say it. The announcer’s deep voice and the sensual way he describes their burgers is nauseating.

I decided that we needed our own “manly: burger commercial. Well, not so manly because it’s my voice, but whatever. It’s probably their idea of a nightmare… and my idea of good food.




23 Responses to “the veginator”

  1. Penguin September 22, 2009 at 8:36 pm #

    Well done, but I think it needs more boobs and maybe a sports car to look more delicious. Maybe it could drop from the sky directly onto some boobs.

    • Kris September 22, 2009 at 9:07 pm #

      That, my friend, would be awesome.

  2. karmalily September 22, 2009 at 8:44 pm #

    Ahh those commercials drive me nuts! It’s crazy to me that a company can be so blatantly sexist and not constantly be grilled by the public about it. You’re commercial is much better!

    • Kris September 22, 2009 at 9:08 pm #

      I know! How has there not been a major uprising against their advertising?

  3. Sandy September 22, 2009 at 8:44 pm #

    OMG I am so turned on!! When are you making it next so that I can have this nom?

    • Kris September 22, 2009 at 9:08 pm #

      I’ll let you know. 😉

  4. Celine September 22, 2009 at 11:24 pm #

    I came for the boobies. where are the boobies?

    • tahinitoo September 23, 2009 at 7:54 am #

      You pervert.

    • Kris September 23, 2009 at 9:11 am #

      Hey now… 🙂

    • Kris September 23, 2009 at 9:09 am #

      Here’s your solution: watch the video again, then look down your own shirt. Problem solved! 😉

  5. Whitney @ Lettuce Love September 23, 2009 at 3:41 am #

    Haha I love love love it!

  6. Lelo September 23, 2009 at 6:09 am #

    Ha ha ha! That is awesome. I hate those stupid commercials, especially the smacking glop sound of the burger at the end: thank you for not including that in your much better version. 😉

    • Kris September 23, 2009 at 7:22 pm #

      Yes, grossest sound ever.

  7. Ricki September 23, 2009 at 6:29 am #

    Haven’t seen the original, but I do love yours! I’m craving one right now, in fact.

  8. Andrea September 23, 2009 at 7:17 am #

    HA! A juicy burger with a side of laughter!

  9. tahinitoo September 23, 2009 at 7:54 am #

    Hahaaaa! This is the best Kris! And you even put a dill pickle on the side! Our pickles are gonna be famous!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m with Celine though, where are those boobies?

  10. Cherie September 23, 2009 at 7:40 pm #

    I agree – that was great!!!

  11. liz September 23, 2009 at 8:55 pm #

    ahaha!! that is AWESOME! That is so those commercials, to a tee – except not revolting and actually totally huge and delicious looking.

    Oh, and I saw your cookbook at Indigo books the other and it looks fantastic and I waaaaant it for the brownies !! 😛

    • Kris September 23, 2009 at 11:06 pm #

      Yay! It’s so cool to hear about my book popping up in different places. Eek!

  12. Sooz September 24, 2009 at 6:33 am #

    Holy crow that looks delicious! I am very thankful to of not seen the original (yet). Reading everyone’s descriptions of it makes me want to vomit!

  13. Stacey September 28, 2009 at 10:16 am #

    Looks amazing! (And, in my opinion, so much better without the boobies!)

    Just ordered your cookbook! Can’t wait to bake! Thanks for keeping vegan yummy.

    • Kris September 28, 2009 at 7:22 pm #

      Thanks for your support, Stacey!

  14. meansoybean October 6, 2009 at 3:35 pm #

    Wow… and I thought the Harvey’s ringer burger we have here in Canada was bad. I wrote a rant about it on my blog and that post ironically gets the most visits. You know why? Because people are searching for it in google images and they end up finding the image cropped for the post. I wonder how much time they spend on the page once they realize it’s a rant, and then realize they’re on a vegan blog.

    I once made a heart attack sub… took a veggie sub from a local greasy spoon and asked for no cheese. Then I took an entire package of Yves salami, or something, and at the whole oil-dripping thing. It was tough but I did it, and I’m never doing that again 🙂

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